where now?

Do you ever feel like some days you are just going in circles? The same circles you've been going in for months?

Today is one of those days. I'm still trying to find a job, and I'm pretty sure I've already seen all of the scenery I'm passing in this little venture I'm going in circles. Mostly though, the circles are my own that I have created.

Let me clarify: It's not that there are no jobs here. There are just not the kind of jobs that I can see myself being passionate about. Like every sane person, I want to find a job I will not just like, but love. A job that fulfills me. BUT... the jobs in my chosen career field just don't look all that appealing to me from the outside. I've been doing some soul-searching, and I am coming to a scarey conclusion; I spent four years getting a college degree that I just am not that thrilled with anymore. Great.

Here is just a little glimpse of what I am learning about myself. I haven't had a job for 4 1/2 months now, so I've been discovering hobbies like crazy. I dove right into scrapbooking, pretty much have every room of my future dream home designed and decorated in my head, and have gotten very excited about photography. Each of these hobbies has just reinforced what I always knew: I am a visual person. DESIGN MOVES ME!! Colors inspire me. Line, form, light facinate me. The act of creating drives me.

So now my challenge is to put the pieces together and decide what I want for my future. At this point, I don't know what direction that will take me. But I'm on my way. I'll get there. I'll get out of my rut and find new scenery. I'm sure of that.